


Never watch your brother's sex tape

by TheAnderfelsOne



Category: Dragon Age (Video Games), Dragon Age - All Media Types, Dragon Age II, Dragon Age: Origins - Awakening
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Ambiguous Feelings, Inside Carver's mind, M/M, alcohol use
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-06-14
Updated: 2015-06-14
Packaged: 2018-04-04 11:08:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,326
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4135209
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheAnderfelsOne/pseuds/TheAnderfelsOne
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>What happens when you are watching a sex tape, and the persons in it suddenly start to use you in a roleplay fantasy...?</p><p>Or how the sex tape was a bad idea.</p><p>This is only a prelude.</p><p>EDIT: End note added.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Never watch your brother's sex tape

**Author's Note:**

> I deliver this as a prelude to the bigger idea that you might have guessed!! It's crazy how I started this when I already have 3000 words on an other story I want to finish too! But I'm glad this is out of the way, cause now I'm going to focus on DO's next chap. 
> 
> So thanks to all who stick around. Encourage me. Despite the flaws. (l)
> 
> For you, hope you enjoy.

The little balcony was probably the only thing that was nice in that tin can of an apartment on the seventh floor.

 Well, it wasn’t exactly that small. After all, since the apart housed seven people, it must’ve been big enough for it. But that was it. There were just enough rooms for the seven of them, a narrow hall, a narrow bathroom and a living room that shared space with the kitchen with only one couch and an armchair. When by some miracle they all planned to watch a movie and _actually_ ended up watching it _all_ of them together, you’d want to reserve the comfy armchair if you didn’t want to squeeze in on the couch. Or rearrange the wool carpeted floor with your pillow and blanket to make it comfy.

Anyhow.

That balcony was Carver’s favorite spot. From the seventh floor – which was the last floor – you had a gorgeous view of Kirkwall. You could even make out the University and the park where Carver liked to train out. But Carver liked it better at night. When the city lights flickered along with the stars and the multihued lights of the neighbor nightclub. Hightown in Kirkwall stayed alive even after midnight. And that was the first thing Carver liked when he arrived in the city. He got there at 22:00 pm and the city looked like it just woke up. The excitement was quickly ebbed when Garrett brought him to his apartment. And turned into grimness when he said it was shared with five other guys.

But the balcony was nice. When you closed the glass door, it quelled the noise inside better than closing up your own bedroom door.

Usually when Carver was on the balcony by night, it was because he wanted to relax. His brother called it brooding. But then his brother was an ass.

No, his brother was more than ass.

But this time Carver was on the balcony because he needed to think. And if it was chilly outside and he only had a thin sleeved shirt over his skin, then it was probably good since he needed it to chill the boiling feelings of confusion and frustration and irritation that smashed together like two rival gangs in a back alley against his guts.

He took another drag of his cigarette. Usually, Carver seldom smoked. He liked sports too much to gamble with his health, unlike his brother again. But the bottle of whiskey on the handrail was common.

Hawke’s genes were whiskey-enhanced. Even their father playfully attested to that.

He looked down at the animated neighborhood and puffed out rather restlessly.

Everything had started to look up for him. When he came to the city, he promised he wouldn’t let himself be shadowed by his big brother again. Even if he was back living with him, life didn’t stop at living arrangements right?

Carver knew deep inside him that ever since he could remember, he looked up to his big brother Garrett. It had started with awed admiration when he was a brat. Then he hit the petulant teenage age and the admiration turned into sullen jealousy. He wanted to be as cool, as popular, as strong. He wanted Garrett’s friends and girlfriends. Hang out with the attractive people and be shown the respect the name Hawke was attached to.

 It had stagnated ever since and now at twenty, just when he thought he finally matured past that shrewish attitude and took hold of his own reins, he had to find that video tape.

He took a big swig of his bottle. The hot alcohol felt fucking great down his throat and chest, a good contrast with the chilly air that prickled his skin from the outside.

That was right. For some time now, Carver started to find his grounds. His own grounds. Even if living amidst Garrett’s gang, he got himself his own friends, a nice part time job and a girlfriend.

Speaking of which, Peaches sent him another text. It was the fifth one making his phone buzz on the small folded table beside him.

She tried to call him after the two first messages’ve been ignored, but he didn’t pick up either. Her last text said:

_Carver I’m starting to worry. W don’t u pick up your phone? It’s frustrating :s_

Good, he thought. Someone should be frustrated along with him too.

Another swig of whiskey and he begun to feel lightheaded. And that too felt good. It made him think about certain repressed feelings with less distress.

His mind drifted to the first time he heard about his big brother – the womanizer – the guy who had more girls than you probably warm dinners – interested in another guy. A guy who happened to be his roommate who happened to date his other roommate.

Varric saw it first. The cunning bastard; nothing escaped his radar in the house. Then Isabela started with the innocents remarks _. “Hey, I wonder, does your brother have a type. You know, for blonds.”_ Or _“I think our Garrett is straining a bit too much to make Anders laugh don’t you think?”_

And it went on like that for a while, before he noticed the first wink Garrett tossed the guy one night while they were all crowded in the living room watching a horror movie. It was dark, everybody was half hidden in his blanket but he saw the connection pass almost inadvertently. He had just wanted to grab a chip. It had lasted but a second. But it had been all there.

The wink. The shy ambers fluttering. The tiny smile. The tiny smirk.

For the first time ever, Carver thought he was safe. That was something he knew he’d never envy. A guy? Nah, Carver didn’t play for that team. Of that he was sure at least. But then why Garrett, who was even more of a straight shooter, would’ve suddenly been interested in a casual guy such as Anders.

Carver leaned against the railings and put his head against his knuckles. The man was just… a normal dude. He thought he knew his brother’s proclivities by heart now. So what changed? Could Garrett’ve seen something else underneath the outer package?

And that was how Carver started to pay more attention. To Anders. To his face. His manners. The way his eyes caught all the light when he talked. The way his laugh resonated - liquid smooth and pleasant in its natural goofiness - when someone said something funny. His deft fingers that brushed Nate’s long hair back at breakfast. His Shy attitude in campus because he was just there for the violin courses.

He had just wanted to understand his brother at first. All those peeks were just to decipher what was going on in his brother’s mind. Was that what attracted Garrett? Was it something else entirely? Something he wasn’t privy of?

And Carver noticed and speculated while Garrett worked his magic away from prying eyes.

Garrett denied seducing Anders while he was still in a relationship that time they went for a night out at the Hanged Man with Varric. He didn’t know if the inebriated state made him lie fluently or if he didn’t want to sound like an asshole but Carver doubted his brother’s confessions while Varric just nodded sympathetically.

 And dwelling on it now served no purpose but the crafting of a headache. He stubbed out his cigarette on the handrail and flicked it away in the wintry air.

Or. Maybe Garrett did really not seduce Anders away from his boyfriend but just… acted as the Garrett Hawke their dad believed him to be beneath all that boast. A good and considerate person at heart. Maybe Garrett didn’t plot on snatching Anders from Nathaniel. Maybe Garrett just showed that concealed side of himself and dropped the mask when he was alone with the blond man.

Maybe it was Anders who’s been smitten. And just like that, an image flicked in the forefront on his mind, slightly hazy but still clear of the first time he saw them kiss.

He was getting back from the grocery store. He even remembered what he had in his hands. A bag of canned beers and stupid multicolored smiley marshmallows.  He turned the corner and they were there by the gate, at the entrance of the building, kissing so passionately Carver wondered if it was actually their first kiss. He’d been really startled. As much as he and everybody saw it coming full-throttle, the sight… the real picture, Anders wrapped in his brother’s jacket and arms, his violin case on his back...  

He bit his lips. Hard.

Carver shook his head violently. He picked up his bottle and downed the last gulp in one go.

He never wanted this. He had finally become his own man. Away from the pressure and the shadow of his big brother. Anders was not for him. Would never be anyways now even if he broke up with Garrett. It just wouldn’t feel right. Not for him and not for his brother. And yes, he was showing some motherfucking consideration too. See father.

He picked up his long forgotten phone and dialed the number of the only person whom he trusted with his secrets and would listen with no judgment. The other line clicked at the fourth ring.

_“Hello?”_

“Hey. Hum, you’re still awake?” Carver rumbled awkwardly.

_“Yeah of course! What’s wrong with your voice? You all right?”_

“Yeah yeah. But I’m not feeling well… listen something happened  and I thought I was pretty much fairly over it and now I don’t know what to think…”

The voice on the other line paused, some shuffling and then it said slowly, _“Carver, are you rambling? What happened?”_

A loud sigh. “That fucking tape. That’s what fucking happened.” He whined painfully.

_“What tape?”_

Carver looked at the city lights before him for a moment, pondering whether he could trust his interlocutor and finally decided he didn’t have a choice. It had to get out. “I found a tape. A sex tape of Garrett and Anders. And in it, they… they were talking stuff about me… kinky stuff, fuck,”

_“What the fuck!? You’re for real?”_

“Do I look like I fucking clown around.” Carver bit back annoyingly though he knew it was stupid since of course he couldn’t actually see him. 

_“Fuck… what happened then?”_

“Nothing… I just saw it… I… Daylen I dunno what to fuckin’ do. You know how I used to feel about him, fuck.” And thank the Maker it came out in past tense. “Can I… can I come over? I mean if you don’t have anything planned…” He only hoped his voice didn’t sound too pathetic.

Daylen let a low friendly chuckle, “Well I was indeed planning to get nice and privy with a BBQ meatlovers pizza and a pack of beer. Can you drive?”

Carver smiled, “Okay, yeah, I’ll take the bike. Be there in a few then. Oh and…” he chewed on his lip and uttered softly as if the night sky might mock him, “Thanks man. You’re the only one I could talk to about this, you know.”

His cousin had always been something like a distant best friend for him. He knew his family members, he knew about his complex relationship with his brother, and was familiar with Garrett’s character since childhood. There wasn’t anyone with whom Carver could complain and grumble about his family other than his cousin who was distant family too. He understood and he was what he needed right about fucking now.

_“I know, I’ll wait for you then. Don’t speed down the road.”_

“Yes mom.” Carver said with no real heat behind it and ended the call.

He slid the glass door open and fetched his most warm open hoodie and keys. But just as he crossed the hall toward the front door, this latter creaked open suddenly, and it spilled one Anders and Garrett wobbling drunkenly on their feet. No, actually it seemed like it was just his brother who was wasted. Anders was just hauling him up with one arm around his waist while Garrett had his thrown around his boyfriend’s shoulders.

Carver paused there, startled until warm ambers made contact with him, “Oh hey Carver,” He smiled, flinching slightly under the weight of Garrett’s large muscles, currently chuckling at something or the other. Anders followed his gaze, “Sorry, the happy hour extended a bit too longer than necessary…” he said with an apologetic smile. 

“Yeah… I see that…”

Garrett chose that moment to bump in. “Heyyy baby bro. You missed one fucking good night at the Red Horse tonight! They had karaoke and the birthday of a chick who bought a round of drinks for eeevryone!” and he tried to raise one arm for emphasis but it only made him sway dangerously off his feet.

“Don’t worry, I’ll tuck him in bed and make sure he sleeps on his stomach,” Anders added, preferring to address the more sober young man (who wasn’t exactly so sober) as he started to nudge Garrett to walk again.

“Aww you’re gonna tuck me in, ain’t that cuute, but I’m not that drunk bae, we can still have a little funn,” Garrett slurred lewdly against Anders as they passed by Carver.

“Yeah yeah,” Anders mused, shaking his loose hair.

The black haired man then craned his beanie head to look back and mouthed to Carver, ‘Gonna fuck him’ with a smug grinning conspiratorial face as if it was to be a secret between them.

Then Garrett started to sing song drunkenly. “… I’m gonna give you a little taste… of the sugar bellow my waist, youu nasty boy…” and broke into a fit of laughter, hanging onto Anders like an oversized koala.

Carver watched them disappear down the hall, whipped out his phone and texted _: Think I’m gonna crash at yours for the night too._

**Author's Note:**

> I add this late note for those who wondered who are the rest of the roommates. There're the guys from my previous fic: A too narrow hall for seven people. Might as well be conected. But can be a stand-alone.


End file.
